christiannovelli

Anonymous asked:

how do i not look/feel like a huge idiot when i talk to people

christiannovelli answered:

O WOW. This is how I feel each time a conversation ends or begins. I think the more important aspect is the feeling. Because generally I rly doubt you look like an idiot when you are talking to anyone, unless you are doing a bunch of flips and tricks or something, which is cool, actually. Essentially it is impossible. You are likely just perceiving yourself 2 look dumb or say the wrong thing or envision yourself doing weird hand movements, ect. At least from my experience, when you have social anxiety, you warp yourself into some weird creature that is the worst version of yrself x10000. The key is not changing yourself, but rather letting go of the worry that other people are thinking negative things about you. YES they will sometimes. I dont like that fact either, but it is just something u must accept. However, you cant live to impress anyone. Most people are not judging you and the coolest ppl wont care at all. I have a huge fear of ending conversations in a way that isn’t perfect. If the last thing I said to someone isn’t the exact greatest sentence possible, it starts to make me panic. Looking at this from an outsiders perspective, it literally dilutes ur life and makes you not able to enjoy things, because you are thinking constantly about how you are perceived by others. This is a bigger issue than just ‘not worrying’ but thats the main theme. Try to talk to a therapist or get some sort of starting point for recovery. Social anxiety and most other occurrences can be helped or at least made easier to deal with. When you start to melt into negative thoughts while/after talking to someone, quickly tell yourself to stop. Aggressively drive ur mind away from it and dont let the evil part of ur brain tell you that you did something wrong. Have more conversations and put yourself in fearful situations, as this is one of the most common methods of improvement. It is all ok. We r both dumb idiots probably but who cares. Thx for asking god bless regards best wishes